Agency client speak translated (via Google Reader)

Agency review - we haven’t the balls to fire our agency

369 degree thinking - we can’t afford TV

Aligned - big agency speak for ‘we agree’ or, more precisely, we don’t agree but we want you to think we do

All agency workshop - lots of suits and planners doing passive aggressive and achieving nothing

Amplification - Can we have a bigger media budget?

Best practise - copy everyone else

Brainstorm - useless, half baked ideas

Cultural strategy - strategy

Chemistry meeting - free ideas

Challenger strategy  -strategy

Content led -we can’t afford strategy

Consumer led - written by  a focus group

Digital strategy - strategy

Disruption strategy - strategy

Hard working - tactical retail ads given to a junior team because no one else wants to do them

Intuitive - trust us. This is brilliant. Versus counter intuitive, trust us, this is even more brilliant, even though it makes no sense, not even to your target

Lateral thinking - the brief’s bollocks so we ignored it

Learnings - cock ups

Media Arts strategy - strategy

Media neutral - we can’t afford TV

Populist - written for the lowest common denominator

Provacative (person) - bad manners

Provacative (campaign) - brand manager will get fired if it doesn’t work

Resign the account - fired

Strategist - planner

Safe pair of hands - useless

Scope it out - get someone (not me) to actually make this unworkable idea work

Soft launch - NPD have given us a dog and we haven’t the clout to tell them no one will buy it. Or no one got their act together in time (see All Agency Workshop)

Tissue session - presentation of weak, half baked ideas

Thought leadership - market share losership

Think of us as partners, not suppliers - we want to renegotiate the fee

Work in progress - work not started but we had to show you something

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